AUBURN – The song came to Katherine Amsden before Sept. ll. At the time, it had no words. It was simply a melody that ran over and over again in her head.
Amsden, a therapist with a private practice in Auburn, eventually sat down at her piano and played the song. Weeks later, after terrorists killed thousands of Americans, she and a friend came up with lyrics to address the suffering and confusion being felt by people throughout the country.
The words- "In this shattered landscape. How much can our hearts take? No rhyme or reason. God we must believe in" -started spilling out, Amsden said.
She called the song "To the Heroes that Remain," and she dedicated it to the survivors of the Sept. ll attacks.
"In the week following the attack, I searched for a way to help. And this song was a creative response," Amsden said. "The music is an action, a way to work toward healing."
Healing through actions such as music and art is a technique that Amsden has practiced with her patients for several years. A member of an organization called Therapeutic Spiral International, a group of therapists that uses this therapy to treat trauma patients who suffer from post-traumatic stress, she came up with the idea to use her song to help those who suffer from similar feelings as a result of the tragedy.
She is selling the CD for $5 to cover her production costs, and she is asking people to make an additional contribution to the therapists' organization. The money will be used to train therapists to treat "survivors" with this unique form of therapy.
Amsden will be singing and selling the song Nov. 2 at a benefit concert at the First Universalist Church in Auburn. For more information about the CD, call 777-1508.
BANGOR DAILY NEWS
FRIDAY, MARCH 8, 2002
BY DALE MCGARRIGLE
OF THE NEWS STAFF
Since the tragic events of Sept. ll, Katherine Amsden has discovered a talent for music that she didn't know she had.
As a psychotherapist, she"s now using her new songs to help others heal.
"It was something I felt I was being called to do in the wake of this tragedy," explained Amsden, a licensed clinical social worker.
The Auburn woman, who like many had quit piano lessons as a child, began playing the instrument again about a year ago after her 9-year-old son, MacKenzie, urged her to buy one so he could take lessons.
Her music took on a new urgency after the events of Sept. ll unfolded. Amsden, who had been going to New York City to study psychodrama since 1998, said she felt a real connection to the residents of that metropolis.
As she was processing the horrors of Sept. ll with a fellow therapist, Tammie Byram Fowles, "I began to play a piece of music that had been rolling around for a couple of months," recalled Amsden, 44. "Then we just began to write the lyrics, expression how we were feeling."
After e-mailing the lyrics back and forth for a week, the pair had finished the song "To the Heroes that Remain" by mid-September. On Oct. l, Amsden sang and Roy A. Clark produced the song at Pine Point Productions in Windham.
She credited Fowles with helping to make the song a reality.
"She was an integral part of this," she said. "If it wasn"t for her spirit, her cheering me on, I wouldn't be doing any of this."
The CD has been a family affair for Amsden. Her husband, Mark Souders, drew the artwork for the cover. Her older son, 17-year-old Colby, burned the CDs and reproduced the cover art. In addition to insisting on the piano purchase, MacKenzie provided "musical inspiration."
"It just shows that basic folks like us can make a real difference in healing this world after tragic events like this," she said.
Since then, Amsden has been selling the single, largely by mail order, for $5, to cover her costs in preparing the CD, then sending any additional donations to Therapeutic Spiral International, a nonprofit organization that provides psychological services to trauma survivors. The funds will go into a scholarship fund to allow both clients and professionals to attend therapeutic-spiral workshops.
TSI promotes the use of the therapeutic spiral model, used to treat post-traumatic stress inflicted by not just such traditional causes of emotional and physical abuse or natural catastrophes, but terrorism and other political trauma as well. The model, created by Kate Hudgins, is one in which Amsden believes strongly.
The therapeutic spiral model joins traditional talk therapy with art, music, dance and psychodrama in an effort to get the client to open up.
"It"s an expressive model with a solid clinical base," Amsden said. "It allows emotions to be expressed in a safe, contained way, so that the person isn't overwhelmed."
Amsden recently has returned from a therapeutic-spiral workshop in Ottawa, where she performed her song "Born Again." She's next going to an institute, "Healing Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder in the Community," March 13-17 in Charlottesville, Va. The institute is training professionals to be part of teams that put on therapeutic-spiral workshops, and Amsden"s dream is to raise enough money to train and establish such a team in Maine.
"That way, if we have horrible events, we have something to respond with," she said.
Another challenge for Amsden has been to get "To the Heroes That Remain" to the emergency workers that the song honored.
"I have a special place in my heart for these people," she said. "They showed us how to go into the fire and be strong enough to survive. This is dedicated to them, and I really wanted them to hear it."
Amsden first delivered a copy of the CD to the Mayor"s office in New York City, hoping it would be forwarded to the firefighters. Then she heard about a firefighter's retreat being held in early February in Bethel. She contacted organizer Jan Brownstein, and he invited her to come and perform. Working with pianist Rob Robbins and guitarist Chip Carney, she performed "To the Heroes" and three other songs. She also handed out copies of the CD to the firefighters.
"The firefighters were so touched and appreciative," she said. "they were coming up to me afterward, giving me special pins. I'm planning to contact their counseling departments, to see if any of them could come to the institute."
Amsden has discovered a new fount of creativity, writing 14 songs since Sept. ll, all of which have a therapeutic quality to them.
She's now in the midst of recording another of her songs, "Freedom," based on Franklin Roosevelt's "Four Freedoms" speech. She'll be recording with choir singers form the Lewiston-Auburn area. The CD will be used as a fund-raiser for local police and fire departments. She'll also be performing the song at the Liberty Festival July 4 in Lewiston, as a tribute to local firefighters, police and EMTs.
Most of all, Amsden hopes the lyrics of "To the Heroes That Remain" help people to heal.
"Here in this moment,
Our spirit tattered and torn,
We must move forward,
In time we carry on,
With love we must go on."
For information on the "To the Heroes that Remain" CD, write kenzcol@aol.com. For information on the therapeutic-spiral model, contact Katherine Amsden at 777-1508.
Addendum:
Amsden has continued to use her music within the community to promote healing. She did perform "To the Heroes" and "Freedom" in her community at the tribute to local firefighters, police and emergency personal at the July 4th 2002 Liberty Festival as stated in the article. Since then, she was honored to perform again in her community to commemorate the first anniversary of 9/ll followed by singing at the Arts & Healing Conference in New York City in October 2002 where she shared the TSM model with this Arts community as a model for healing in the aftermath of 9/ll.
Since then Amsden has been working with Roy A. Clark to produce a full album of her original songs called, "Music With a Message." She recently wrote a song in response to her work with clergy abuse survivors called "I've Had Enough" and performed "I Found My Voice Again"(previously called "Born Again") at an event to address the crisis in the church through Voice of the Faithful in Portland, Maine. "Peace of Mind In Harmony" was performed locally during a rally in January 2003 to counter the effects of a white supremacist group who came to her community to oppose the immigration of Somali's there. Her songwriting is often sparked by the work with Therapeutic Spiral International such as the latest song "Awakening" written after a deep, rich TSM weekend on Preventing PTSD During the Holidays at Rehobeth, Beach. She is happy to continue offering the music at our TSM weekends and will again use her album expected out in the fall of 2003 as a TSI fundraiser. To order CDs please see our contributions section on this web site.
Amsden believes this music is a way to do TSM work on a community level. It is a way to reach people through the arts and she credits her personal growth within the model, the support of the TSI community and her higher power as the strengths she holds dear.